I don’t know about you, but I’m an all or nothing kinda girl. If you clicked on this blog post, chances are you are too. Sometimes, this character trait serves me well. For example, when I decided to take my health back, it was as simple as making the decision and with the snap of my fingers, I was officially vegan, no turning back, no easing my way in. All or nothing. As a result, my health transformation was swift and dramatic. 100 pounds in 1 year.
Other times, this trait haunts me. This month my family is away visiting family in Greece, and momma is riding solo. Whenever I mention this to friends or colleagues, their immediate reaction is, “Wow! No kids for a month? Finally some time to kick up your feet and relax!”.
Call me crazy, but my first thought was, “I can get so much done while they’re gone!”. Naturally, I loaded up my schedule so that my days involve me running around like a mad woman from sunrise to sunset, 7 days a week. New clients, additional yoga classes, house remodeling, house cleaning/organizing, an increased workout/training schedule, the list goes on and on. Oh and on top of it all, somewhere along the line I decided breakfast was no longer a priority.
Like I said, I’m an all or nothing kinda girl.
I’m here to report I made it about 2 weeks before my body gave me the middle finger and quite literally FORCED me to sit a day out. And even then, I balked.
Here’s what I have learned about myself, what I constantly struggle with. I CAN’T SIT STILL. Not just physically, but mentally. If I have to sit at home, ALL I can think about is all the more productive things I could be doing. It is so hard for me.
Here’s what that really means…and I hate to admit it, but here it goes…
My name is Stephanie, and I’m a control freak.
Anybody that knows me personally is probably cracking up because to them it’s so obvious, but for me it takes me pretty much passing out from exhaustion to even become aware of this fact about myself. Nevertheless, it’s true. I fill my day with appointments, workouts, cooking, cleaning, and so on so that I can be in control.
I had a dear friend tell me, “If you fill every minute of your day up, you leave no time for God (insert your preferred word here – Universe, Mother Spirit, Mama Jama, Big Kahuna, etc etc) to guide you.”
Well, I never thought of it like that…
Here’s the thing, I LOVE what I do. I LOVE being a Health Coach and yoga teacher. It fills me up and I cannot believe that I get to do what I do for a living. I also LOVE to workout. It is a meditation for me. Maybe you are nodding your head because you too love your job and love to hit your yoga mat or the gym, but even people who love their job need to take a break. I always associated the feeling of being “stressed out” with having to do things I didn’t like. The reality is that the body doesn’t know the difference between stress from a job you hate and stress from an overbooked schedule of activities you love. To the body, physiological stress is physiological stress.
I’m writing this blog post because I need to hold myself accountable. I have committed to doing one relaxing act of self love everyday, and I encourage you to do the same. I cannot be of service to other people if I am burnt out and running on fumes.
Last night, I took a bath with epson salts and listened to one of my favorite podcasts. It was glorious and I haven’t felt that relaxed in months. Needless to say, I slept like a baby. Today I am sipping on this delicious golden milk matcha latte while writing and later I’m making time to hang out with some amazing people that I love, people that lift me up, nourish my soul and aren’t afraid to tell me when I’m going down the rabbit hole.
What are your favorite self-love practices? I need some suggestions! What do you do to unwind, shut the mind off and just relax? Comment below!